So the Holidays are over ......

Happy 2007!

I think by now just about everyone I know is back at work for 2007 - if you're not, I'm not sure I want to know! I hope you all had a good holiday season - and if you didn't get some time off, I hope you have some scheduled for the not to distant future!

Everyone I've spoken to seems to have survived the Christmas / New Year period - though among the 30-somethings there seems to have been the odd bout of parent-induced stress. Family can be a joy - but it can also provide us with some of the greatest stress in our lives, and it seems that this is most prevalent at times in our life when either we're redefining our identity's (think: being a teenager, leaving home for the first time, moving back home, getting married etc) or our family unit is trying to redefine itself (think: births, deaths and marriages).

Interestingly enough, there's been heaps written in recent times about how the 'empty-nest' syndrome has been delayed by children leaving home later and later. Going hand in hand with this concept has to be the idea that parents are finding it harder and harder to accept that their children are independent humans who have their own lives. I'll give my parents this - they don't seem to have that problem! But I've noticed that a number of parents seem to be willing to see their children move on shortly after uni ends, but struggle when their children return home from uni, overseas, at the end of relationship, etc to treat them as adults who are capable of managing their own time, relationships, washing and cooking .... I'm sure part of this is to do with wanting to do more to protect their children in a world where the dangers are unseen and with greater frequency are things that you just can't protect against without locking yourself in the house and never leaving.

Of course, the flip side of this is that whilst young people seem to be in a real hurry to grow up (who ever heard of 9 year olds wearing crop tops, deodorant, high heals, or having mobile phones 20 years ago?) they don't always seem to be grasping the responsibilities that go with being a grown up. What's that a symptom of? Over protection? Lack of accountability in our society? I'd be tempted to argue for both. How do you tell a child (or for that matter anyone?) that they have to take responsibility for their actions (i.e. if you take that anti-social action, there will be consequences) if you have never asked or required them to do so previously? Society teaches us that bad behaviour is "cool" - think any number of celebrities - and that if you do get caught doing something anti-social, the appropriate response is to call blame your behaviour on either alcohol, drugs, poverty, poor-family dynamics .... the list goes on. The only way to discourage bad behaviour is for there to be real consequences that apply to everyone.

I'm sure there are those of you who disagree - I'd love to hear why!

Take care - Dee xxx

PS: Congratulations to ex-PLC student Ellie and her husband Ryan on the birth of baby Ruthie .... I can't wait to meet this much wanted child :)